We went to get our marriage license on June 13th at City Hall in San Francisco. It is STUNNING. You do not need to be a San Francisco resident to get your license there.

Elliot proposed in June of 2021, when we’d already started our wedding planning and had our venue, Carmel Valley Ranch, booked. We had talked extensively about what we wanted our wedding to be, with intimate at the center of our plans. In the spring of 2021 we started looking at venues prior to our official engagement as we were in the midst of COVID wedding postponements that meant wedding venues and vendors were being booked 18+ months in advance to accommodate for 2020 and 2021 brides. We had a challenge though, we were set on a wedding date of June 25th to mark our 10 year anniversary.

At the time, we were living in California, but we had met in Seattle, so we were open to venues in either location. Seattle was quickly ruled out due to June often being “Juneuary” there and focused on California. We knew that none of our guests would be coming from California which meant that we wanted to find an area that felt like a true getaway to our guests. We looked at venues in Napa Valley, Santa Barbara, Los Angeles, and Carmel-by-the-Sea. Carmel became a no brainer to us, and we fell in love.

With guests flying in we knew that we were going to make it a wedding weekend. This meant that we had to adjust our budget accordingly to afford three days worth of events. We looked at venues where all of our guests could stay. Some were venues with cabins on site that were included in the cost of the venue rental, and some were hotel options where guests would book their own rooms. We selected Carmel Valley Ranch as our venue, a resort in, you guessed it, Carmel Valley. Ultimately, however, we decided not to do a room block at CVR. While the rooms are stunning, the views breathtaking, and the amenities impeccable, that all comes with a hefty price. We didn’t feel comfortable asking our guests to pay $500+/night for a room. We decided to do a room block at the Lamp Lighter Inn in Carmel-by-the-Sea and pay for a shuttle for our guests to/from the venue.

If you’re planning a Carmel Wedding Weekend, be sure to check out our Day 2, Rehearsal Dinner + Carmel Valley Ranch Wedding posts.

Day One: Wine Tasting

Our families all arrived into SFO on Thursday afternoon, we packed up not one but two cars full of suitcases, IKEA bags (highly recommend for storing wedding decor), and more, and were off on the ~2 hour drive south to Carmel-by-the-Sea. We checked into Lamp Lighter Inn, I went with Lauren (MOH extraordinaire) and Mum to get our nails done, and then we did a family dinner at Seventh + Dolores. It was so wonderful to have the entire family together to celebrate and kick off the wedding weekend! Having a day to get settled before guests arrived was also helpful and allowed me to get our welcome gifts set up in our guests’ rooms.

Friday morning we went to do a rehearsal at CVR. One of the things that “sold” us on the venue was all of the swings. When we were little babies in high school we first said “I love you” on swings at Roanoke Park in Seattle.

Friday was the official start to our wedding weekend and when our guests, outside of family, began arriving. Elliot and I knew that we wanted to do some activity with our guests that allowed them to see Carmel-by-the-Sea and Carmel Valley and get to be a bit of a tourist. Naturally, we decided on wine tasting! Side Note: If you are doing a destination wedding, we would recommend building something into the wedding weekend that allows guests to see the town they are visiting. Lauren + Zach did this through a dinner cruise around the Los Cabos arches. It does not have to be paid for by the bride + groom, but is nice to have something scheduled to help your guests!

We decided on three stops: one in Carmel-by-the-Sea and two in Carmel Valley.

Stop One: Galante Vineyards

Our first stop, Galante Vineyards, was walking distance from Lamp Lighter Inn, which was helpful to limit the amount of time we needed to rent a shuttle for. Galante is tucked in one of the charming little alleys that makes Carmel-by-the-Sea seem like it is from straight out of a fairytale!

Galante allowed us to book a large tasting (we booked for 25) without paying for a private tasting space as long as we arrived at noon when they opened. This was perfect as it was set to be our first stop of the day! Galante was lovely to work with—they were communicative in the booking process, and I appreciated their honesty in helping us book without needing to pay for a private event space! We were able to taste 5 wines for $25 + 15% gratuity. The wines were wonderful, the staff was knowledgable, + we were able to revisit any of the wines (always a plus!). While they have indoor + outdoor space, we opted for indoor as Carmel-by-the-Sea can be a little chillier.

Stop Two: Scratch Wines

We walked back to Lamp Lighter Inn to meet the shuttle bus for our second stop: Scratch Wines in Carmel Valley. Scratch Wines is in a beautiful, open, bright space with a more eclectic style than most wineries. Their bottles all have unique artwork as the labels, and a tasting allows you to taste all 7 of their wines for $25 (+20% gratuity for groups).

We arrived for our tasting and opted to include a few charcuterie boards, and then I noticed they have frose and had to order one. Scratch was lovely and allowed us to have a large space with couches, chairs, and tables, at no rental cost. This was huge for us in looking for wineries. We wanted to be able to host all of our guests, but wouldn’t be able to afford to if it included paying for rental fees (which can be thousands of dollars). This took a little bit of legwork, but was so worth it in the end! Note: Don’t be afraid to ask. Scratch first came back to me with their pricing including the event rental space and I asked if they’d be able to accommodate us just as a large group vs. a private event. They said yes! Not all wineries did, but it never hurts to ask.

Another thing that we love about Scratch is that it is walking distance to a number of other wineries. We thought that if our tasting ended in enough time, our guests would have the ability to walk to The Wine House, Joyce Tasting Room, and others in the area before our next stop.

Stop Three: Folktale Vineyards

Our third and final stop: Folktale Vineyards! Folktale is designed in a similar manner to Carmel-by-the-Sea where you feel like you may just be a princess (this may or not be aided by the tastings you do before arriving here). For Folktale, we knew people would be getting hungry so opted not to do a tasting, but to pay the $15 deposit that they require per person when making a reservation. This would be about the cost of a glass of wine for our guests and then they’d be free to order their food on their own. Elliot ended up putting his card down at the end of the meal with the promise to Venmo everyone. Weeks later, he still hadn’t Venmo’d…So that became an additional charge in our wedding budget (always, always, always add a “miscellaneous” line to your event budget).

Folktale was a trickier one to work with, but we love the space. It’s outdoors, there’s often live music, + it gives the feel that you’re in the fabulous backyard of a friend’s home. I’d wanted to reserve the greenhouse for us, but they quoted me $4,000 just for the space. We went with just a large reservation instead, + they ended up seating us in the greenhouse—a win! Groups mainly split bottles of wine + pizzas which made it the perfect early dinner stop for us.

As the wine tasting wrapped up, we looked for a spot where we could continue the night in Carmel-by-the-Sea. Barmel was the recommendation we received + it did not disappoint. We drank, we danced, we had far too much fun.

Timeline:

For an idea on schedule, here is what we did + the timing worked out perfectly:

Galante Vineyards: 12pm Tasting

Scratch: 2:30pm Tasting

Folktale: 4:45pm Reservation

Cost:

Shuttle: $1,125

Galante Tasting: $550

Scratch Tasting: $750

Folktale Reservation: $300

Doing a day of wine tasting was the perfect way for us to kick-off our wedding weekend. We had guests from all chapters of our life: childhood friends, college friends, coworkers, plus-ones, etc. Within our group, each person really only knew one or two others (with the exception of the ladies who joined me on my bachelorette in Cabo). Starting with a day of wine tasting allowed all of our guests to get to know one another. That combined with having all of us stay at Lamp Lighter Inn took away any potential awkwardness (that, and the fact that we truly have the most wonderful people in our lives—insert welling eyes emoji) + the next day, Rehearsal Dinner Day, had people who hadn’t known each other the day before meeting up for lunch, beach walks, etc during the day.